The time has come again to say goodbye to the short summer season we enjoy here in New York, and say hello to autumn.
Stuff about this season that sucks:
Halloween. Not only is it easily the worst holiday as an adult, the witchy shit being taken seriously is ridiculous and needs to go asap as it's all rooted in white supremacy.
Food. I can only think of one traditional autumn food that's any good, and that's a food that's absolutely not restricted to autumn - potatoes. Not sweet potatoes (ew), just good old potatoes. Turkey/tofurky/turkey flavored stuff sucks, stuffing is elevated bird feed, cranberries taste awful, sweet breads are almost always terrible, and I've never had pie that made me want to take a second bite. Coffee is one of the worst popular drinks I can think of, but it's not as gross as apple cider. Even autumn-themed cocktails and beers suck, they all have pumpkin or apple or cinnamon in them. Yuck.
Clothing. There are no good looking cool weather clothes. Every single person wearing layers looks like a child bundled up for a snow day. I've never seen an actually functional coat that didn't look ridiculous. Boots make most people look like Herman Munster. Hard pass on fall fashion.
Activites. It's too cold to do anything fun outside for very long, and the activities traditionally associated with autumn are lame as shit. Apple picking? Jack-o-lantern trails? Leaf spotting? Just shoot me instead ffs.
I really can't wait for spring.
No comments:
Post a Comment